No matter how evolved we think we are, when we are caught up in a terrible tragedy we don't just sit around wondering what lessons we can learn from it — we are just simply holding on for dear life, hoping we can survive. Tragedy arrives in a blur, often accompanied by hopelessness, feigned calm and a fog-like numbness that feels like a surreal dream. The last thing we may need when in moments of tremendous trial is empty reassurances that everything will be ok. Often, it most certainly will not be ok. What it will likely be though is different, and you will be different too. It's better to just accept that things aren't ever going to be the same again. As for all the lessons, sometimes we need a break from learning lessons. Sometimes we just need time and space alone; we can always learn later. In the crossroads of a painful crisis what we always need is a moment to breathe, pray and accept our fate with dignity. This is how we steady ourselves against the great trials of life; quietly, not always bravely, but deep down in solitude, where we find our strength to survive.